Part 2

We had a suite meeting tonight. Good things happened with the fridge and freezer. I mentioned that I want people to wipe the counters. The reaction of the one-with-whom-I-have-conflicts was "I won't agree to wipe the counters unless EVERYONE does it with clorox wipes, or some other disposable thing. Rags need to leave the kitchen". I got upset because of this. To me, it sounds like she's saying she'd rather have the counters covered in crude than have me wipe them off with a wash cloth. I can intellectually understand why she thinks it's gross. What bothers me is that I've been cleaning the counters, etc. with rags and wash clothes all last semester and up until today, and she didn't feel the need to mention how much it grossed her out. I'm probably crazy for being bothered by this. But by her admitting now that she thinks I'm spreading microbes when I think I'm keeping the kitchen clean and pleasant for everyone, she makes me feel like a complete idiot and an ass. Plus, it makes me feel like she has no respect for my ability to try and live with her. I'd like to think that if the first time we talked about dishes, cleaning, etc. she had mentioned that she can't stand seeing rags hang around, that I wouldn't feel so attacked. Because we could've found a different place for me to hang my dish towel right away. I wouldn't feel so dumb. It doesn't help that the reason this whole issue came up is that I pushed her to talk about it.

We didn't really cover the issue of dishes much. Which might be a problem later.

She also mentioned that someone (aka me) had put a dish with half a lemon in it over with the dirty dishes when the dish was clean, and she intended to use the lemon again. Which made me feel like an idiot on one level, that I can't recognize something someone wants to re-use, like an ass on a second level, because clearly I'm not respecting other peoples space like they want me to, and angry, because she's the one who left something that could be considered dirty in a place that I work in, and expected me to leave it in my way. To throw her own words back at her, everyone shares the kitchen. Which means to me that the top priority should be cleaning up after yourself so others can use the same space. I think her focus is more on leave everyone's stuff alone, and if it's in your way, you tell them, and THEN they will move it. I happen to find it easier to move the stuff, and hope that next time it won't be left in the same place. But, I agreed to try and let stuff sit in my way for a day, until I talk to the person who owns the stuff, and only then, if they don't move their stuff, can I clear a space for my Japanese homework.

Somehow, I feel like I didn't make any of the points I wanted too, while I agreed to subject myself to the will of others to a greater degree. But would I feel better if we had talked about dishes, and everyone had agreed to make more of an effort to keep the dish drain empty, and the piles of dirty dishes contained? Or if someone had mentioned keeping the entire suite clean, and people had decided to spilt up some of the tasks?

As much as I don't want to relinquish control over the level of cleanliness of the suite, it would be nice if other people swept up their food crumbs and hair collections in the corners. Or at least acted like they noticed it. How do I live with people who freak out over harmless rags, without noticing the growing collection of slime in the bathroom sink and tub, and the armies of crumbs all over the kitchen floor?

At least, now I know more what bothers people. Which was my admitted goal for the meeting.

I'm way too accommodating, and focused on how to keep other people content. But I don't want to unknowingly cause anguish to the people I share a common space with.

I'm becoming addicted to the facebook. It was on the news a few days ago. Apparently, some places looking for interns check out their facebook profile before hiring. Watch out!

Roommates Rant

What a fucking night. I hate some of my suitemates at this moment. I thought I was doing well on the accommodate-the-roommates-so-living-together-isn't-hell factor, but apparently there has been some miscommunication. I think the trouble comes down to my idea that to make things better, you say what bothers you, and people try and be aware of that, and you do the same courtesy for them. That relies on the fact that the other people think they should mention what bothers them, and that they are willing to change if you change. Maybe I'm the wired one in the suite, being the neatest, and cooking the most, and wanting people to clean up after themselves. FUCKING HELL. How do you talk to someone who doesn't think there is anything to talk about? How do I communicate how frustrated I am without attacking the people who are doing the stuff that bothers me?

She essentially called me a complainer, and someone who can't solve problems that she doesn't believe exist, saying I had to run to the RA and make it a big issue. FUCK YOU. Maybe we should've talked to everyone else before we went and asked the RA to come talk with us, but I feel like the response I got for saying why I want to RA to come justifies it. If I think there's a problem with the kitchen, and you don't, isn't there a problem that should be talked about, even if it's not what I originally thought? I'm trying to make things work for both of us bitch, I think I'm ready to make changes so you are comfortable, I hope you feel the same way, because otherwise I might go crazier.

I know I am reacting a little like the kitchen is mine, and everyone should accommodate me, but that's also why I want to talk. I'd like to know what people expect in the kitchen so I don't go around disturbing their shit, and they don't fuck up mine. I really don't think I have high expectations outside of my need to talk about the various stuff that I think could cause problems at some point, which doesn't seem like a big deal to me. Is talking about the spacing of shit in the freezer (etc. etc.) really that pointless to you, that you aren't even willing to humor me and mention that everyone obviously should make an effort to keep their food limited to 1/5th of the freezer space? I'm sorry I don't measure out the dimensions of my food, so that someone will have room to buy ice cream. Fuck.

I think I'm taking 4 classes this semester, which is stressing me out, because the English I decided to take has a lot of readings. But now I've committed to it, I can't just go back to taking only 3 classes.

Too much stress. No Ultimate practice to relieve it.

Why do classes start tomorrow? I'm not ready to be responsible.

"Another one?"

The piercing total has been raised to 13. I got my daith pierced. I went with Jen, who got her nose pierced. The guy who did it misinterpreted Jen's joking sexual comments to me and assumed we were a lesbian couple. Which we are not, but if we were... we'd be "the cutest lesbian couple" (I quote at least one person).

My fish have tail rot, and are dying. Except the two coolest ones. I can only hope the medicine I bought will save the healthy ones...

I don't think I'm ready to go back to school. I have to think about "the future". As in, I have to actually do something about getting an internship sometime relatively soon, and think about going to Australia, and maybe look into art classes this summer.

Teeth

I got my wisdom teeth out. Not pleasant. I am not enjoying the after-effects of not being able to eat. However, it did justify me sitting around and watching movies for three days...

By the way, happy belated new year. Yaay. My new year's party did not go as planned... But I did kick ass at beer pong.