Before

Oh yes. Epic party tonight. As the most evil freshman, I will be there all night (unless otherwise distracted...). This is me, buzzed, anticipating, and still in some version of reality. *insert mental image here*.

Why am I still in my empty room?
Damn straight it's fucking empty. My rich roommate left this morning, taking the T.V. the carpets, and the comfy chair. I'm thinking of taking over her bed, that way when I stumble home tonight, I won't wake my other roommate while attempting to climb up to my top bunk.

I love the way Douglas Adams writes. It's such crazy combinations of words, that even as I read the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy for the fourth or fifth time, I am amazed, though the original laughs are gone. Example:
"The second worst [poetry] is that of the Azgoths of Kria. During a recitation by their Poet Master Grunthos the Flatulent of his poem "Ode to a Small Lump of Green Putty I Found in My Armpit One Midsummer Morning" four of his audience died of internal hemorrhaging, and the President of the Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived by gnawing one of his own legs off. Grunthos is reported to have been "disappointed" by the poem's reception, and was about to embark on a reading of his twelve-book epic entitled My Favorite Bathtime Gurgles when his own major intestine, in a desperate attempt to save life and civilization, leaped straight up through his neck and throttled his brain."
Maybe not the best example. But read it yourself, if you haven't. It's worth it. I promise. And if The Hitchhiker's Guide is not appealing, try The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul. Equally entertaining and wacky.
If I ever write, I would love to have the same quality of weird-ness.
But I doubt I ever will write. I'm too lazy.

Another Year Gone

I can't believe I'm done. One year of college done, and I still have no idea what I want to do with my life. I *hoped* that in college I would find one topic that I really love, but I guess I didn't take as many random classes as I should have, because that love has not appeared.

I feel older though. That's an accomplishment.
I also think I value sleep more. When I get home, even with no curfew, I think its safe to say I will be going home with time to get 7 hours of sleep. In high school, with a curfew, and with waking up at 6:15 for school, sleep was not at the top of my list. In general, I go to sleep maybe one hour later than I used to, and wake up 3 hours later.

I can't believe I survived in a triple. Now that I'm packing up half of my stuff for my dad to cart away, my tiny area is getting way too tiny. I'm feeling slightly claustrophobic. Though I can't say I've been the best roommate, I will say I have probably the worst deal in the room, and I got here first. I may not be overtly generous, but I do sacrifice my comfort for the sake of others. Who knows if my roommates know that, though. To them, I'm probably just the weirdo who claims to be a morning person, and than never goes to sleep before 2, and the person who uses up their tissues when mine are gone. I guess I really do have allergies. Never thought it was such a problem till this year. Perhaps my allergies are worse than ever? Anyway, I got both my roommates a box of tissues, and I'm planning to get them candy, as an end of the year present.

Maybe my different sleeping pattern had a good effect-- my roommates never complained about me snoring, or even told me I snore.

Ultimate is over. Or at least, over this year. I don't want the seniors to leave. I don't want Ben to go away and never come back. I'm so bad at goodbyes. Not because I cry, or get super emotional, but because it never hits me that people are actually gone.

Rubber Ducky

you're the one!
I have the best rubber ducky song EVER. It's Bert and Ernie singing in German with a techno beat. AMAZING.
So at Midnight Breakfast:
Girl: "Is that rubber ducky anyone's"
*glance*
Me: "ummmm......... It's mine"
thinking 'I thought it was that guys who was sitting here before. I guess not. I wanted it then...'
Girl: "Are you sure?"
thinking 'no way you're getting that duck instead of me. It's on my table'
Me: "Umm... YES"
*Girl walks away*
Kasey: "That was awesome"
thinking 'I HAVE A RUBBER DUCKY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'
Suckers.

Maybe I really am evil. I can't decide if I want people to think I'm evil or good for the frisbee thing. Somehow, I'm thinking evil is the way to be. I also think if you're gonna go one way or the other, commit to the action. Go extreme. Go for the first slot. Haha. No way I'm the most good or evil.

I've been in the computer lab since about 2pm yesterday.

That's not entirely true. I had to work and sleep for some of that time. But I was just going and going trying to finish my English portfolio by 5 today. I made it by 5:10. Sadly, I missed my last Japanese class while editing my research paper. Sadly I didn't wake up to my alarm this morning and was 45 minutes late to my job. Those crazy workout people were mad I'm sure. Some lady called me at 9:30, I was confused because I felt the vibrations through the bed rather than heard my phone vibrating on the table, I was like "Hello?" *glance at the clock* "OH SHIT!" I guess I was a lot more tired than I thought, even though I felt semi fine last night when I went to bed at 5:30. I still haven't pulled an all nighter. I was considering it last night, but I decided sleep is important than mindless writing if you are editing a paper. Last year there was one night I stayed up till 4 and felt amazing, and I was considering pulling an all nighter to study for physics, but I decided to sleep. Still managed to feel amazing the next day. And I think the only caffeine I had that day was from tea...

Oy. Now the discipline begins. I need to get a solid A on my Calc final, which should be manageable if I study. I would LOVE an A on my Japanese test, but I think a really high B is my best bet.
If I get no A's (and by A's I really mean A-... I am happy with my low A's) this semester I would be sad. But I kinda deserve that in all my classes except sculpture. I'd like to think I deserve an A in that. I can't believe I'm still thinking about taking 21 credits next semester. I have been such a slacker... And I'm gonna want to be even more active in terms of running... and I still will need a job... OY!!!!

At least I can collapse tonight...

Regionals

Oh god, I'm nervous. I'm supposed to be a handler, and I feel like no one should trust me with the disc that much in a real game. I feel like I don't deserve the position yet. And during sectionals I wasn't playing well. Whew. Breathe. I want to be a handler. And to be a good handler, I need to start now. I just don't want to disappoint people because I freak out. Time to realize I'm probably judging myself a lot harsher than everyone else. Time to just do it, as I tell everyone else.

Hmm.. also time to write a paper. Yummy.